A year ago my husband wasn’t home with me. He was deployed and it sucked. I was a mess the day he left and the entire first week that he was gone. Eight months seemed like such a long time to be away from the one person I was used to seeing every single day.
I didn’t know how I was going to make it but a funny thing happened after the first week of pure depression and sadness. I kind of got over it. I realized that being sad all day wouldn’t change my situation and this was a chance for me to live alone for the very first time in my life and accomplish some of the goals I have for myself. So far I’ve done 5 things I’m really proud of.
I started paying off my debt.
As a couple we spent less money when Kyle was gone. He didn’t have much time for entertainment and his food was paid for and I cut back on spending too. I’ve always been the frugal one in the relationship when it comes to everything besides clothes. All of that extra money was put toward debt. We had a few credit cards, my student loans and his car. I’m happy to say that I no longer have credit card debt and everything else outside of my student loans will be paid off by the middle of next year. We also have a plan to pay off my student loans in three years. That experience taught me how to live below my means and save money.
I got back into shape.
Love makes you do crazy things like eat a lot and never go to the gym. My husband is an awesome cook and I am not so while he was away I ate less rich and filling foods because I couldn’t be bothered to prepare gourmet meals for myself. I lived on a steady diet of protein shakes, salads, sandwiches and cereal. I also started hitting the gym three or four times a week and it showed. I don’t know if it was entirely healthy but I’m let’s go with it.
I started my own business.
I’ve always wanted to be an entrepreneur but I convinced myself that I wasn’t smart enough or pretty enough or just plain good enough. One night while sitting at home and thinking about how I didn’t want to work for other people forever I decided not to make excuses for myself anymore. That night I created a logo, made business cards and put myself out there. The next day I went to a networking event and got three clients right away. Now my business is growing fast and it’s because I decided to start when I did. Having all that time to focus on creating and growing my business was been amazing.
I focused on my hobbies.
I started to really focus on blogging. I wanted to get serious about blogging a long time ago but like starting a business I convinced myself I wasn’t good enough. It was great to discover that I am in fact better than good. I’m great. I’m awesome! Well, at least in my mind I am and that’s really all that counts. I also started sewing and doing crafts again. Those are all things that I might have gotten around to doing with Kyle at home but I wonder if I would have put the same amount of time and energy into them. As a couple we have so many things that we do together that I think we forgot about doing things alone.
I ventured out of my comfort zone and made new friends
It was very nerve racking to move all the way to San Diego from South Carolina but the fact that I didn’t do it alone made it so much better. Once we got here Kyle and I spent all of our free time together exploring and finding out great things about the city. During our first month here I only made one real friend who is awesome but I definitely wanted more of the social life I’d grown accustomed to in college.
Kyle and I were together so much because we were each other’s comfort zones in this new city. I also didn’t want to do things with new friends and leave Kyle alone and he didn’t want to do that to me either. While he was away we’ve both expanded our social circles and it’s been great to introduce him to my friends and meet his friends.
So, basically I grew as a person and all that other crap while my husband was off doing his duty for our country. I’m so glad I didn’t let the fact that he was gone defeat me. It was good to get used to it because guess what. It’s a year later and he’s gone once again.
What event did you go through that helped you grow as a person? Let me know in the comments below.